MBA Vs. BE Student
This particular joke won an award for the best joke in competition
organized in Britain and this joke was sent by an Indian......
A MBA and a BE go on a camping trip, set up their tent ,and fell asleep.
Some hours later, the BE wakes his MBA friend. "
look up at the sky and tell me what you see." The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
The MBA ponders for a minute. "Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"
The BE is silent for a moment, then speaks.
"Practically...Someone has stolen our tent".
“ENGINEERING = 100% COMMON SENSE
organized in Britain and this joke was sent by an Indian......
A MBA and a BE go on a camping trip, set up their tent ,and fell asleep.
Some hours later, the BE wakes his MBA friend. "
look up at the sky and tell me what you see." The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
The MBA ponders for a minute. "Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"
The BE is silent for a moment, then speaks.
"Practically...Someone has stolen our tent".
“ENGINEERING = 100% COMMON SENSE
What is Life?
What is Life?
A professor stood before his Philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes." The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. "Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. "The golf balls are the important things - your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. "The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. "The sand is everything else--the small stuff. "If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. "The same goes for life. "If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. "Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. "Take time to get medical checkups. "Take your partner out to dinner. "Play another 18. "There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. "Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. "Set your priorities. "The rest is just sand." One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. "It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a cup of coffee with a friend."
Please share this with someone you care about.
Health - Important Notice
Health - Important Notice
Reduce the amount of TEA you consume
Do not eat bread which has only JUST been toasted
Keep your distance from hand phone CHARGERS
Drink more WATER in the morning, less at night
Do not drink coffee TWICE a day
Reduce the amount of OILY food you consume
Best sleeping time is from 10pm at night to 6am in the morning
Do not have HUGE meals after 5pm
Do not take alcohol more than one glass/cup/serving a day
Do not take pills with COOL water
Do not lie down immediately after taking medicine before sleeping
Getting LESS than 8 hours of sleep affects your health
People used to napping will not get old easily
When battery is down to the LAST grid/bar, do not answer the phone The radiation is 1000 times Answer the phone by LEFT earIt'll spoil your brain directly by using right ear Do not use headphones/earphone for LONG period of timeRest your ear awhile after 1 hour Forward this to friends whom you CARE about
Reduce the amount of TEA you consume
Do not eat bread which has only JUST been toasted
Keep your distance from hand phone CHARGERS
Drink more WATER in the morning, less at night
Do not drink coffee TWICE a day
Reduce the amount of OILY food you consume
Best sleeping time is from 10pm at night to 6am in the morning
Do not have HUGE meals after 5pm
Do not take alcohol more than one glass/cup/serving a day
Do not take pills with COOL water
Do not lie down immediately after taking medicine before sleeping
Getting LESS than 8 hours of sleep affects your health
People used to napping will not get old easily
When battery is down to the LAST grid/bar, do not answer the phone The radiation is 1000 times Answer the phone by LEFT earIt'll spoil your brain directly by using right ear Do not use headphones/earphone for LONG period of timeRest your ear awhile after 1 hour Forward this to friends whom you CARE about
Ice-In Case of Emergency
We all carry our mobile phones with names & numbers stored in its memory but nobody, other than ourselves, knows which of these numbers belong to our closest family or friends. If we were to be involved in an accident or were taken ill, the people attending us would have our mobile phone but wouldn't know who to call. Yes, there are hundreds of numbers stored but which one is the contact person in case of an emergency? Hence this "ICE" (In Case of Emergency) Campaign The concept of "ICE" is catching on quickly. It is a method of contact during emergency situations. As cell phones are carried by the majority of the population, all you need to do is store the number of a contact person or persons who should be contacted during emergency under the name "ICE" ( In Case Of Emergency). The idea was thought up by a paramedic who found that when he went to the scenes of accidents, there were always mobile phones with patients, but they didn't know which number to call. He therefore thought that it would be a good idea if there was a nationally recognized name for this purpose. In an emergency situation, Emergency Service personnel and hospital Staff would be able to quickly contact the right person by simply dialing the number you have stored as "ICE." For more than one contact name simply enter ICE1, ICE2 and ICE3 etc. A great idea that will make a difference! Let's spread the concept of ICE by storing an ICE number in our mobile phones today!!! !Please forward this. It won't take too many "forwards" before everybody will know about this It really could save your life, or put a loved one's mind at rest . ICE will speak for you when you are not able to!
The Perfect Boss
The Perfect Boss . . .
There were about 70 scientists working on a very hectic project. All of them were really frustrated due to the pressure of work and the demands of their boss but everyone was loyal to him and did not think of quitting the job.;
One day, one scientist came to his boss and told him - Sir, I have promised to my children that I will take them to the exhibition going on in our township. So I want to leave the office at 5 30 pm.
His boss replied "OK, You're permitted to leave the office early today"
The Scientist started working. He continued his work after lunch. As usual he got involved to such an extent that he looked at his watch when he felt he was close to completion. The time was 8.30 PM. suddenly he remembered of the promise he had given to his children.
He looked for his boss, He was not there. Having told him in the morning itself, he closed everything and left for home.
Deep within himself, he was feeling guilty for having disappointed his children. He reached home. Children were not there. His wife alone was sitting in the hall and reading magazines.
The situation was explosive, any talk would boomerang on him. His wife asked him "Would you like to have coffee or shall I straight away serve dinner if you are hungry.
The man replied "If you would like to have coffee, I too will have but what about Children ??"
Wife replied "You don't know ?? Your manager came here at 5.15 PM and has taken the children to the exhibition "
What had really happened was ... The boss who granted him permission was observing him working seriously at 5.00 PM. He thought to himself, this person will not leave the work, but if he has promised his children they should enjoy the visit to exhibition.
So he took the lead in taking them to exhibition
The boss does not have to do it every time. But once it is done, loyalty is established.
That is why all the scientists at Thumba continued to work under their boss even though the stress was tremendous.
By the way , can you hazard a guess as to who the boss was..?
He was none other than Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam, FORMER President of India . .
There were about 70 scientists working on a very hectic project. All of them were really frustrated due to the pressure of work and the demands of their boss but everyone was loyal to him and did not think of quitting the job.;
One day, one scientist came to his boss and told him - Sir, I have promised to my children that I will take them to the exhibition going on in our township. So I want to leave the office at 5 30 pm.
His boss replied "OK, You're permitted to leave the office early today"
The Scientist started working. He continued his work after lunch. As usual he got involved to such an extent that he looked at his watch when he felt he was close to completion. The time was 8.30 PM. suddenly he remembered of the promise he had given to his children.
He looked for his boss, He was not there. Having told him in the morning itself, he closed everything and left for home.
Deep within himself, he was feeling guilty for having disappointed his children. He reached home. Children were not there. His wife alone was sitting in the hall and reading magazines.
The situation was explosive, any talk would boomerang on him. His wife asked him "Would you like to have coffee or shall I straight away serve dinner if you are hungry.
The man replied "If you would like to have coffee, I too will have but what about Children ??"
Wife replied "You don't know ?? Your manager came here at 5.15 PM and has taken the children to the exhibition "
What had really happened was ... The boss who granted him permission was observing him working seriously at 5.00 PM. He thought to himself, this person will not leave the work, but if he has promised his children they should enjoy the visit to exhibition.
So he took the lead in taking them to exhibition
The boss does not have to do it every time. But once it is done, loyalty is established.
That is why all the scientists at Thumba continued to work under their boss even though the stress was tremendous.
By the way , can you hazard a guess as to who the boss was..?
He was none other than Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam, FORMER President of India . .
Truth Behind Stock Market
Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared andAnnounced to the villagers that he would buy monkeysfor Rs. 10/-The villagers seeing that there were many monkeysAround, went out to the forest and started catchingThem.The man bought thousands at Rs. 10/- and as supplyStarted to diminish, the villagers stopped theireffort. He further announced that he would now buy atRs. 20/- This renewed the efforts of the villagers andthey started catching monkeys again.Soon the supply diminished even further and peoplestarted going back to their farms. The offer rateincreased to Rs. 25/- and the supply of monkeys becameso little that it was an effort to even see a monkey,let alone catch it!The man now announced that he would buy monkeys atRs50! However, since he had to go to the city on somebusiness, his assistant would now buy on behalf ofhim.In the absence of the man, the assistant told thevillagers. Look at all these monkeys in the big cagethat the man has collected. I will sell them to you atRs35 and when the man returns from the city, you cansell it to him for Rs. 50/-The villagers squeezed up with all their savings andbought all the monkeys.Then they never saw the man nor his assistant, onlymonkeys everywhere!!!
Welcome to the 'Stock' Market!!!!!
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